My Mystery Blogger Award Nomination!

I would like to thank the beautiful hope.s of “The One With Feathers” for nominating me for this award!

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“Mystery Blogger Award”  is an award for amazing bloggers with ingenious posts. Their blog not only captivates; it inspires and motivates. They are one of the best out there, and they deserve every recognition they get. This award is also for bloggers who find fun and inspiration in blogging; and they do it with so much love and passion.

– Okoto Enigma 

The rules for this prestigious award (courtesy of Okoto Enigma, the almighty creator) are as follows:

1)  Display the award logo on your blog.
award2)  Thank the blogger who nominated you and provide a link to their blog.
3)  Mention the creator of the award and provide a link.
4)  Tell your readers 3 things about yourself.
5)  Answer 5 questions from the nominee.
6)  Nominate 10 – 20 bloggers.
7)  Notify your nominees by leaving a comment on their blog.
8)  Ask your nominees 5 questions of your choice, including 1 weird or funny question.
9)  Share the link to your best post.

Three things about myself:

1. I love dogs of every sort.

I know the stereotype that most writers prefer cats, but 1) I’m allergic to cats and 2) I like the temperament of dogs more than cats. Dogs are loyal and love you no matter what and look adorable doing so. What could be better than that?

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2. I’m pretty sure I know more about British history than I do American history. 

I didn’t realize just how lacking my knowledge of American history was until we learned about Pearl Harbor in one of my history classes and I had to google who the president was at that time. Yet I could write a 10 paper over what World War II was like for the British without needing any secondary resources.

Nothing against the good ‘ol US of A, but I just find British history (particularly English history) to be more interesting. I mean, come on, they’ve got royalty. What do we have? A bunch of peasants throwing tea in a harbor. Okay, I’m being too harsh. Still, Europe is so much older than the United States so their story has more depth and intrigue. Plus, they have castles. Frigging castles.

3. I think Math is the most awful thing ever invented. 

No one has ever rejoiced more than I did when I passed my final math class of my school career. Learning math, for me, was like taking a class taught entirely in Russian. Sine, Cosine, Pythagorean theorem-

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I have had countless help from countless tutors, spent hours on single problems, and have dedicated years to trying to get this crap, but it’s never sunk in. One thing I can console myself with is I knowing that I have the ability to make change if necessary and that geniuses created tiny rectangular devices that allow us to calculate sums without using our fingers and toes.

Nominee Questions Answered:

1. If you could be considered an expert at something after 15 years of diligent study/work what would you want to be? 

I guess the obvious answer is become an expert at writing (I consider myself an ambitious amateur at the moment) but if I had to chose something besides this I would want to become an expert at guitar or piano. It would be nice to sit down and create my own music, but I didn’t learn how because I gave up on piano too easily :/

2. What is the first thing you would do if you suddenly woke up 100 years in the past? 

Probably cry because there is no internet. However, I would pick myself up eventually, and then heavily invest in the automotive industry. Or become a bootlegger. What? Worked for the Kennedys, old sport.

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3. What is your “pointless” superpower? 

I am good at doing impressions and making animal noises. Especially squirrel sounds. The reactions to this gift are usually shock and awe.

4. If you won a free trip to a destination of your choice, where would you go? 

I think I would want to go back to Edinburgh, Scotland. I spent a few days there last summer, but there was so much I wanted to do that we didn’t have time for. I would like to go on another haunted tour since I had so much fun on the last one.

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A photo I took from the top of Edinburgh Castle.

5. Where is your favorite reading spot? 

My bed. I have a million pillows to lay on so it’s nice and comfy.

I think my favorite post that I’ve published is I Cant Write At Home. The Internet Wants My Soul. 

I nominate Stuart McEwan “Forge from Reverie,” A.M. Bradley The Forgotten Writer,” Candace “Literary Dust,” ArcaneHalloween Precinct 1313,” Austin L. Wiggins Writings By Ender

Questions for nominees:

  1. If you had the opportunity to rewrite any novel, which novel would it be and what would you change? 
  2. Name the funniest book you’ve ever read and why it made you laugh.
  3. Where is your favorite place to write/read?
  4. If you could have drinks with any literary character, who would they be and why?
  5. What’s you philosophy on life? 

Again, a big thank you to hope.s for nominating me for this award! To my nominees, keep up the excellent work, I enjoy reading all of your content.

How to Become the Best Writer Ever in the History of the Universe!

Hello, reader. I am a writer person like you. Definitely not someone strapped to a chair against their will.

Do you want to learn how to write like a super-awesome writer guy?

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Becoming one of the giants of literature is easy with these simple steps.

Step One: 

Take something you’ve written. Just anything. It could be a poem, a play, a short story, just whatever. You got it? Okay, now set it on fire. Now take a picture of your literally flaming passion and upload it to Instagram. This is guaranteed to catch people’s attention.

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Step Two: 

Take your college degree off the wall and caress it lovingly. Are you caressing it? Good. Now weep. Go ahead, I’ll wait. That’s it. Let it all out. Let the debt and unemployment flow through you like a river. It’s okay. Your parents were never proud of you to begin with.

Step Three:

Keep a physical diary of all your failures. If you have been failing that means you’ve been trying. And, boy, have you been trying a lot. It’s alright if your tears smudge the ink. This is just your own personal record. No one else will read this. Just like no one else will read those books you self-published or blog entries you posted on WordPress.

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Step Four: 

Drink heavily while you write. This will inspire you to write more and will totally not convince you to phone your ex-lover. All the best writers drank. And they all lived happy, productive lives. Well, aside from the ones that committed suicide or died under suspicious circumstances. But that’s beside the point.

Step Five: 

Tweet every single thought that passes through your mind. Don’t even think about it. Just Tweet it. There is no way this could possibly go wrong. Tweet your politics. Tweet your religion. Tweet about people you don’t know but have heard through third-party sources that they did something terrible and so you must condemn them for actions you don’t know they committed for sure. Why? Because certainty is for plebs.

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Step Six: 

Tell everyone you are a writer. EVERYONE!! Hand out business cards at the grocery store. Give one to that chick at McDonalds who looks like the grease fumes have liquified her brain, give it to those Mormons who will show up at your door any second now. Have you done that? Okay, don’t write now. Don’t write a single word. Go to Youtube. Your work is done. Everyone knows your brilliance.

Follow these steps and I promise you that…something will probably happen.

What?

I don’t have all the answers.